Oh deer.
This morning on my run i saw a deer, just standing there on the bike path, chillin like a villin like it owned the damn thing. It wasn't until i was about five feet away from it that it looked at me as if to say, "Oh, so you want to use this road too?" and then casually hopped its little bum like a billion feet into the air to get over the fence and down the side of the little hill there. It almost made me feel awestruck in sudden closeness to wildlife and nature. Well, it should have almost made me awestruck, except i was in the middle of running through the lyrics to Kelly Clarkson's hazle eyes in my head, and i was calculating that about six miles, that's about 600 calories, that's about a fifth of what i ate yesterday while trying to study for the GMAT, and if i get home in under an hour i'll still have time to shower and pack up my stuff to drive to Bentley straight from work and if only i had remembered to wash my bras yesterday while was at home i wouldn't have to wear the same exact camis i wore to the party on sunday, because even if i wasn't sweating they smell a little bit like wine and sugar, and who wants that smell all day when you're trying to work and study and stay up till midnight and not eat, and what's this flippin deer doing in the way? Doesn't he know i've on a tight schedule?
I have entered the i-will-eat-anything stage of my stress cycle. It comes right after the i-am-on-a-strict-diet-for-the-wedding stage, just when the stress of trying to put together the wedding invitation list meets the stress of trying to take the GMAT in July and not knowing the multiplication tables. At this point i would have to work out for a solid week straight to equal out the amount of chips i ate this weekend while doing math problems. if 2ab=1/a+3/b2, a apparently equals i need to eat a heaping plate of tostitos and b apparently equals times 50million!!!!!
Confidential Note to my old highschool boyfriend: Do you remember how you used to get me speed and it like made me really thin and like able to study? Well, do you think we could that again, but, like, you know, without the me needing to make out with you part?