We recently started getting the Boston Globe delivered to our home. We committed to this daily force-feeding of print media for three very good reasons:
1) We hate hippies and want to destroy the rainforests FASTER.
2) We must be updated on the status of the Big Dig DAILY or we will never feel safe in Boston.
3) Get Fuzzy is simply not the same online.
Also, we both need jobs, and there are jobs in the newspaper so they tell me. Also they called our house offering the newspaper at less than half price and WE'RE POOR, HOW COULD WE RESIST???
The Boston Globe prints its daily funnies and other non-news in a half-page insert it calles the "Sidekick." This is always the first section out of the paper because Leah likes the comics and Dan likes the number puzzles that make absolutely no sense whatsoever, i don't even understand how they work, how could someone stare at them for thirty minutes? So this morning like all mornings the sidekick was sitting face up on the table. Hillarity ensues, in this dramatic recreation of our conversation:
Leah: "I have orientation tomorrow."
Dan: "You do? I thought you had orientation on Saturday."
Leah: "Tomorrow is Saturday."
Dan: "It is? Then what did i do yesterday?"
Leah: "I don't know what you did yesterday!"
Dan: "Well if yesterday was Thursday i did absolutely nothing!"
Leah: "Wait, maybe it's Thursday today. Let me check my phone."
(i pull out my hip-top and flip to the callendar.)
Leah: "Oh you're right, it is Thursday... (losing interest in this embarassing conversation) I like that photo on the Sidekick."
Dan: (looking at me like i have three heads) "Photo on the sidekick?"
Leah: "Yeah, where they're all holding cameras."
(Again the three heads look)
Leah: "Wait......(i look at the sidekick in my hand, then at the one on the table, then at the one in my hand.) (pointing to the table:) "The photo on that sidekick."
Dan: "This joke will never translate to the internet."