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So we're having a little production issue this week, vis a vis the milk supply. I don't know if it's because of the recent hot weather, or a baby growth spurt, or the fact that I recently lost 37 pounds (there's a reason cow's are fat after all)... at any rate, the heaving bosoms that only two weeks ago could have grace the cover of a harlequin novel are now more of the drooping sagging variety. Seriously, men with their viagra thing? I totally get that now. When the baby's crying again and there's hardly a drop left in the spigot, the performance anxiety can be overwhelming.
There were two days last week where it was so hot I could barely bring myself to shove down a piece of toast halfway through the day, and the baby was so fussy in the afternoon I had to slap myself and be like: Look Leah... This relationship you have between you and your body? You're not the only one involved.
Which is hardly news. I was pregnant for an absurdly long time after all, so I should be used to taking care of my body on behalf of someone else. But then eating was never something I had to, ahem, remember to do. When I was pregnant I couldn't survive through a two hour stretch without consuming my weight in bagels. I would have breakfast, pour several cereal bowls full of cherries, and eat them non-stop until it was time for lunch. I know right? Jealous?
But then as soon as the baby came out, my stomach was all "Phewf! Glad that's over." Literally, the day after birth I felt the first relief from hunger that I had felt in 10 months. And it was like aaaaaaah... So this is what it feels like to have a thought in my head that doesn't involve cake.
So as much as I'm enjoying the respite from being Leah-the-human-garbage-disposal, it is a challenge finding a balance between my weight loss and Harvey's weight gain. Not that he's going hungry, Mr. Double Chin 2009. He just prefers the milk delivery vehicles in heaving model. And really, can you blame him?
UPDATE: I ate a snack before bed, and over night the inventory returned to buxom levels. Go figure.