Saturday was my all day Grad-school orientation for which i was so terrified i left myself an hour drive 20 miles on an un-busy Saturday morning. Mostly i was not worried about being late, but about being the only young cute person in attendance. As i walked down the stairs to the breakfast i immedietly scanned the tables for other females under 30. First impression: some people have radically different definitions of Business Casual.
Well, it wasn't hard to find the table of cool-kids; the blond highlights reflected the overhead lighting like a beacon. Soon we were chatting away about shopping, the poor quality of the free breakfast, and Why are there so many frickin Indian men in this program? After breakfast we heard some speeches, during which i found out some things about this incoming class... mostly that i'm smarter than them. The average GPA for these 100 students is 3.2, the average GMAT score is 593, and the average age is 31. SUCKAS! I beat you on all counts! My GPA is 23% better than the average, My GMAT score is 23% better than the average, and my age is 22.5% younger than average. I WIN!!!
After the welcome lecture we split into groups for a classroom demo of the case-study method. If all my professors are as cutting as Dr. Sample Demo, i'm going to have a fun time at business school. Example of professor-student exchange:
Professor: "Why is there more than one answer for every question?"
Student: "Because the goals, objectives, cultures, and mission statements of each company are different."
Professor: "You threw every buzzword you knew in there, didn't you? You should know that i think cultures, objectives, and mission statements are mostly Bullshit."
A linguist after my own heart.
Later i took a walk around campus. It felt like spring with the gentle wind blowing, just right to put you in the mood for academic enrichment. I'll spare you the details of the rest of the orientation, since most people could really give two shits about business theory. Suffice it to say that i had a good time, and look forward to really getting down to the business of kicking everybody's asses in class. I mean studying. Studying.