More like Dooce every day.
This morning i took Rascal to the vet because he's been biting his tail so much that he'd ripped a red sore. I was hoping they would tape it up or something, give us some cream, you know, the under two-hundred dollars kind. Unfortunately, the doctor said, this kind of biting can be due to multiple afflictions. He could have mange, or ringworm, or an inflamation in his anal sacks. What now? Well, whatever you say. Why don't we go ahead and check for all of them!
Rascal was not a big fan of the nurse holding him still while the doctor scrapped his tail for a skin sample. He also wasn't enthusiastic about the black light which tested for ringworm. Little did he know what was coming. As the nurse held him tight, his ears pinned back to his head like a terrified skier, the doctor stuck a gloved hand up his butt.
"Those are some big, juicy anal sacks," she said.
Big. Juicy. Anal. Sacks. Yes, that's what she said.
Infact the anal sacks were culprit of his biting. Poor thing. I know how it is with the itchiness due to the anal sacks. And the soreness due to the anal sacks. And the irritation from the anal sacks.
Anyway, after his anal sacks had been squeezed of their juicyness Rascal felt a lot better, although he was somewhat warry of the doctor from that point on. We will have to take him back in two weeks to have his anal sacks checked again. When i was making the appointment, the nurse said, "What is this for again?"
"Anal sacks," i said. "Anal sacks."