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so what's wrong?

Leah's usually the one who writes about the tough times, leaving me to accentuate the positive. As our roles are in pretty much everything, really. But in the interest of balance I feel it's my duty to describe, for a moment, what's making it so tough around here lately. Briefly, it's Lijah.

Lijah's anguished face just after he fell in the mud

ok, so that time he had a good reason to be upset

He is a lovely child, of course, and he has many wonderful qualities. Really, when you get right down to it his only downside is that he's the third boy in the house, and sometimes that tips us out of balance. Like now, when we're trying to get him weaned just as he's entering fully into his terrible twos and realizing that he can't change the world by force of will—which of course just makes him want to try harder. The thing he wants to change most is to be able to nurse whenever he wants, but since that's not happening he's willing to freak out over just about anything else: not being able to destroy all his brothers' toys, not having a tiny lego sword in his hand at all times, sleeping, not sleeping, and—most of all—not being connected to Leah every possible moment.

There's some progress—today he spent five hours with Grandma and Grandpa and then another couple going out to dinner with them, his brothers, and me. He was quite civilized almost the whole time, and he ate a very respectable number of french fries (I'm engaging him on many fronts, but what foods he chooses to eat is not one of them—at this point we're happy for him to take any non-chocolate solids!). But sleeping is still elusive and many hours of the day are taken up with keeping him marginally ok. It's all pretty wearing.

So. As I write stories of our small triumphs and Leah doesn't write at all, know that all that is going on in the background. And realize that, whatever we write or not, we're working pretty hard; and when we, say, make Easter suits and a party for a dozen friends it's just because we're that awesome.

Almost as awesome as Jo and Eugene!

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